breakthrough

{on the stirrings: inside & around our bones, on top of & underneath our hearts}

What stirs you?

What is it that keeps stirring around in your head so much that it makes you sick?

What is it that pulls you into places that are creaky and hard to reach? So creaky you couldn't possibly make it across quietly, no matter how delicate your steps - the sound will still summon.

Where does your heart swell and your tummy heave? Where does your heart breathe and your mind bleed? 

How do you soothe the dis-ease? Do you fold and keel to the ground after all the pain breaks you, sends you down? Or do you just keep battling, circling, and weaving to no end. Resisting what it is that wants to be. 

If you die, what happens? If the stones, the walls, and the boulders that pretend to secure you crash down underneath and around you...Where would you be? 

Where might you go? 
Who would you see? 

Whence you fall...how gently, how delicately, might you stand back up? 

What's it going to take to break you? 
Because My God, I want to know.
 

Is it going to be you? 
Can you do it? 
Not entirely alone, I'm sure.

So who will support you in your breakdown&breakthrough? Who will you choose to unravel all of the knots and bring forth your demons? 

And once it's all over. Once you've winced, and cursed, and cried a hundred times. Once you've gotten through the other side with further strides, will you notice them? 

Will you remember their efforts? 
And will you thank them? 

~ vanessa faria